Attitude Update #2:  Brokenness IS the Pathway to Joy & Forgiveness

“God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” Matthew 5:4 (NLT)

“You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.” Matthew 5:4 (The Message)

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”  Matthew 5:4 ESV

Blessed are those who mourn….

Our 100 pound yellow Labrador Retriever, Boudreaux, never felt guilty for anything he did!  Stephanie had made banana nut muffins & put them on the counter – they wound up gone!! All gone, even the crumbs.  I got on to him for getting the food off the counter. Then she made them again, and we came in and found all the muffins nearest the edge of the counter – had big bites taken out of them. They had not moved an inch!  He followed the letter of the law, but never felt guilty! He was sad he got caught, but never regretted.  He got over it really quick! Unlike us, when we do something wrong we actually have a guilty feeling, no matter who you are or where you live.

As dads our lives can be full of regrets. Why did I speak to my wife and kids that way? Why did I say I was going to take them camping and didn’t? Why did I miss my son’s game when I could have made it?  Why didn’t I be more involved with my children as they were growing up? Those same wrong attitudes carry over to other areas of life which compound our regrets.

You can handle your wrongs in one of two ways.  The wrong way & the right way. The wrong way is stuffing it, trying to forget it, justifying yourself, lying to yourself that what you did really wasn’t so bad, and eventually hardening yourself against it by doing it some more.

The right way leads to being comforted by God

God’s comfort fact #1:  God loves YOU NO MATTER WHAT you have done! This is why He sent Jesus.

“For God so loved the world [your messed up life & my messed up life], that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.  For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” John 3:16-17 ESV 

God’s comfort fact #2:  God is in the Forgiving Business.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”  1 John 1:9

Confession is not only admitting to God the wrong things you have done, but it is admitting you are broken and cannot fix yourself.  This is the only beginning point to real healing and real happiness, comfort, and wholeness. The real problem is that you are broken inside, not physically, not emotionally, but spiritually. God in Christ Jesus is the only One who can fix those broken areas, clear your conscience, and remove the guilt and shame from your life.

God’s comfort #3.  God is in the exchanging business.

“He [God the Father] is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son [Jesus] and forgave our sins.” Ephesians 1:7 (NLT)

Notice what this verse says about forgiveness. Forgiveness does not come through you working hard to become a good person. Forgiveness does not come through you doing good things for other people and the planet. Forgiveness does not come through religion, sacraments, a pastor, a priest, or any other “religious” activity.

Forgiveness was purchased by God the Father through the willing sacrifice of Jesus, God the Son, on the cross for our sins. Jesus was our sacrifice, our substitute, and the perfect payment for our wrongs. Faith secures your forgiveness. Faith in what Jesus’ death accomplished on the cross and His resurrection as proof secures your forgiveness,  when we let go of yourself as the boss (lord) of your life and allow Jesus to be the Lord of your life.

Here is the comforting news:

• Jesus took your guilt so you can have forgiveness.
• Christ took your shame, so you can have full pardon.
• Christ took your separation from God, so you can have peace, closeness.
• Christ took your estrangement from God. So Exchange your estrangement with God’s adoption into His family.
• Christ took your punishment, so you can have acceptance.
• Christ took the death we all deserve so exchange the empty deadness of your soul for His amazing Life! Christ took your sadness, so exchange your sadness for His Joy!

Make the Daditude Point with your family:  Do you want the comfort of your Heavenly Father’s joy, forgiveness, acceptance, hope, and love.  Then go to Him with your sorrow, tell Him about it, ask Him to forgive you, and ask Him to give you to joyful life He wants you to Have. He has already demonstrated He is not angry with us by sending Jesus to die on the cross for us (See Romans 5:8-10). He has already demonstrated to us that He loves us unconditionally. (See John 3:16-17) Now do this for your children too, whether they ask for forgiveness or not. Ask them to forgive you when you fail to keep your word, say or do things that hurt them. Model the right attitude our Heavenly Father wants us to demonstrate to the children He has gifted us with. Pray that they will do the same.

A Prayer to Receive the Comfort of Forgiveness and Joy

Father God

My heart breaks and I grieve/ I am very sorrowful over the things I’ve done.  I am sad that I want my own way and self-will fills my heart at times. I grieve over the fact that I am so easily distracted away from You by such petty and little things. My heart breaks because I know this is not how it is supposed to be and I don’t want to live like this. I need You, Jesus, to change me, to help me to get rid of my selfishness and rebellion.

I turn from my selfish ways and turn to you. I want to follow Jesus and His ways. Please forgive me of all my sins. I thank you that you forgive everyone who calls out to You. I thank You that Jesus sacrificed Himself for my forgiveness and secured it on His cross. Thank you that you have forgiven me!

I don’t want to keep doing these things. Lord Jesus, unless I have your power, Your Spirit in my life filling my, helping me, giving me joy, then I have nothing and I will either self-destruct or be destroyed by the evil-one.

Fill me with your Spirit that I may be strong.

Give me power to overcome the temptations that call out to me.

Please help me clearly see the way out of the temptations.

Help me to run from those that are so dangerous that it will destroy my life. Thank You that You secured my victory on the cross. Thank You that Your resurrection proves You are God and secured my forgiveness and salvation.

Father, I want to be a good example to my children. I want them to know You and follow You. Please protect them from wrong decisions. Help me to set the right kind of example of realizing when I have done something wrong, confessing it to you, and receiving your forgiveness.

Thank you that there is no condemnation, no guilt, no shame for followers of Jesus. You have fully removed them. Help me to walk in an attitude and understanding that I am a forgiven child of Yours. Jesus took my shame, guilt, and punishment on the cross. Help me to help my children know your great love!  Help me not to shame, guilt, or condemn my children but to help them to know forgiveness, acceptance, and love like You have shown me!

In Jesus’ name.

Amen

Bill Stevens

(c) 2019 Bill Stevens, Loveland, CO. No copy or reproduction of this without express written permission from the author.

Daditude Attitude Update #1:  Begin at the Bottom each Day

“You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.” Matthew 5:3 (The Message)

“God blesses those who are poor and realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs.” Matthew 5:3 (NLT)

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”  Matthew 5:3

Jesus begins by dropping a hard dose of realty truth on us.  Simply, the sooner we realize we aren’t “all that and a bag of chips” the sooner our attitude will begin to change for the better. He does not say you should be poor to be blessed.  He said to be “poor in spirit” as opposed to the normal human attitude of entitlement, privilege, deserving, and self-determination that says I can and will chart the course of my life in my own way, which is rich, rich in spirit.

He is talking about how we view ourselves. Pride, hubris and arrogance will cause us to fall flat on our face sooner or later. I was doing extremely well in high school football and my dad reminded me “Son, there will always be someone stronger and faster than you.” I finally met them when I began playing college ball and they tossed me around like a child’s rag doll! I fought back with anabolic steroids, a shortcut that gave me amazing gains really quick, lots of success, but I didn’t realize the damage it was causing my body. I gained so much muscle mass that it frayed my ligaments around my knees. It weakened them to the place where I tore all of them in my left knee in one game so damaging it that it effectively ended my football career. Pride comes before a fall (See Proverbs 11:2, 13:10, 16:10).

Jesus does not mean we are to be poor, although there is nothing wrong with being poor. Poor in spirit, means that you are powerless to change your life or others’ lives without Jesus’ help. God expects us to work hard, but we are incapable of changing our wrong internal desires or the wrong desires of others. Poor in spirit also means we have nothing of real value to offer God. Many go through life doing good deeds and living a good life (which is great) but they believe this is going to help their standing with God. God actually says the opposite (see Ephesians 2:8-10, Romans 3:10). We are not righteous enough and have nothing of value to offer God in exchange for salvation, eternal life, forgiveness or Heaven. Compare your life to Jesus’ perfect, sinless life. He is the gold standard and said if we want to get to Heaven on our own, then “be perfect as your Heavenly Father is perfect.” (See Matthew 5:48). Poor in spirit also means that we are not wise enough to direct our own lives. Do you have any regrets? I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a book full of regrets. We need God’s wisdom and direction because we are not all knowing and He wants us to come to Him for direction (See James 1:5-8, Psalm 23).

Jesus went on to explain it like this when He said “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” John 15:5 (ESV)  What?! I can do all kinds of things and you can to, but none of them will be of any eternal value and lasting fruitfulness without Jesus helping us and working through us.  Simply, poor in spirit means that your realize you are nothing, have nothing, and can do nothing apart from the Spirit of Christ helping you, changing, you and working through you.

Receive God’s Promise when we humble ourselves before Him.

^“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”  James 1:17

The good news is His promise to us is that The Kingdom of Heaven is our possession when we have the right attitude! With the correct attitude of humility, everything God has in His Kingdom becomes available to us. Strength, power, resources, new friends, new family, forgiveness, healing of our brokenness, and even righteousness.

Make the Daditude Impact Point with your family:  As dads, our kids need to see us humble, not making a pride filled fool out of ourselves. They need to see us rely upon God for help, strength, direction, and be thankful for the things He has provided for us. They need to see us needing God, connecting with God, and giving thanks to God for how he led us and provided for us. Why? God wants us to model this relationship for them, so they will learn to rely upon Him. They will need Him one day as bad as we need Him. We can point them to Him by simply being like this. Express your need of God to Him daily and expect God’s amazing provision from His vast Kingdom!

“Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves,.. ” Romans 12:3 (NLT)

“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.” Philippians 2:3 (NLT)

A Prayer to help us be better dads

Dear Jesus,

My pride so fills me and controls me at times.  It keeps me from you, separates me from others and doesn’t allow me to experience the Blessed Happy Life in you.

I get a bad attitude, rush, hurry, and don’t wait on You. I seek to force my own way at times.

Lord, I am powerless without Your help Jesus. Forgive me when I choose to walk in the “wealth” of my understanding instead of the great richness of Your wisdom.  I am poor because I don’t have the wisdom I need, nor the power I need. I am powerless from the control of the flesh, and the slavery of sin without You.  I am powerless to prevent Satan and his demonic army from attacking, destroying my life, and the lives of my family.  But You Oh Lord are all powerful!  Lord, I am powerless to change any person’s life, but You are able with just a Word to forever and radically change the horrible to the holy. Unless I have the Kingdom of God’s help then I fail to be a good dad, help others, serve, do the work you have called me, and be the man you want me to become. I am leading others the wrong way when I don’t follow you.  I am spiritually bankrupt without You. Thank You that You make me a child of yours when I place my faith in You.

Father, I receive your promise when I humble myself before You!

 But now God, I believe Your Word!  I stand on Your promises and by Your grace, I humble myself under Your mighty hand, and I receive the promise of all I need to accomplish everything You have given me.  I receive Your help, provision, resources, and Holy Spirit empowering by faith. I believe Your promises!

I have power over sin because You have given me this power in the name of Jesus! I have power over the desires of the flesh because you have given me a new nature in Christ.

You give me power to escape temptation because you provide a way out for me.  I have everything I need to serve You today because you have or will provide everything I need. That is Your promise!  My faith is in You!

Thank you in advance for providing!   My heart overflows with the joy of the Lord.

In Jesus’ name

Amen

Bill Stevens

(c) 2019 Bill Stevens, Loveland, CO. No copy or reproduction of this without express written permission from the author.

Upgrading your Attitude

Eight Attitude Updates that We Desperately Need

Introduction

We all like being around people with a good attitude. It makes us feel good and feel safe being around them. Without a doubt we know our attitude can bring blessings to our lives or real problems when we let it get out of bounds. Our Heavenly Father, revealed the attitude He wants us to have through His Son, Jesus. Jesus taught a summary of the attitude we should have that is so tight and powerful that entire books have been written about one paragraph of instruction.

This list is called the Beatitudes, the blessed attitudes, the beautiful attitudes, but for this description, I am going to call it the “Daditudes” because I want you to see how these attitudes should positively impact our families.

Jesus definitively states that you will be live the “blessed” life if you have these attitudes. Blessed is a state of being that is beyond happiness but overflowing with joy, peace, and tranquility.

Full Disclosure. To be totally real, I began writing this in 2011 when my kids were little and I would pray these daily so I would have the right attitude. The days I didn’t focus on these are days I would slip up and allow a wrong attitude to take over. If I am the only reader of this, then my family will be better off and that’s all that really matters, but I hope it is a blessing to you and your family too.

Jesus taught these eight attitudes that will bless us and cause us to be a blessing to others.

Matthew 5:1-12

“Seeing the crowds, he went up on the mountain, and when he sat down, his disciples came to him.

² And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:

 ³ “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 ⁴ “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

 ⁵ “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

 ⁶ “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

 ⁷ “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

 ⁸ “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

 ⁹ “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

 ¹⁰ “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 ¹¹ “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. ¹² Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”

 What are these attitudes?

1. Begin at the Bottom – v3
2. Brokenness IS the Pathway to Joy & Forgiveness v4
3. Gentleness Brings Success in our Families – v5
4. Hunger for what’s Right satisfies. -v6
5. Mercy because we need it too. -v7
6. Purity brings God’s presence into our family’s life. -v8
7. Peacemaking makes us like God. -v9
8. God rewards those who suffer unjustly.

Hope you begin this journey!

Bill Stevens

(c) 2019 Bill Stevens, Loveland, CO. No copy or reproduction of this without express written permission from the author.